Estimated reading time: 1 minute
You want to start writing your family history for your kids, but you don’t want to dig through archives, research relatives you’ve never met, or build a sprawling family tree. You just want to write down what you know about your parents and grandparents so it’s not lost.
I wanted to do the same thing, but I felt overwhelmed. So I wrote down the most basic thing I knew: my parents’ and grandparents’ names.
My grandmother’s name was Grace, and that’s also my daughter’s middle name. There were things I wanted my daughter to know about her name. I jotted down a few words, and that led to more.
Your parents’ and grandparents’ names hold more than you might think. Writing them down is one of the simplest ways to begin writing your family history for your kids.
This post is part of the First Timer Storykeeping Series, designed to help you start writing your family story using the Storykeeping® method.
Get Ready to Write
Capture First, Craft Your Story Second
Before you can write down your family names, you need a place to write them. This may seem obvious, but it’s a turning point. Now your story can become something tangible and real. Having two writing spots makes it easier to start.
If you’ve already set up your two writing spots, skip to the next section.
Why two writing spots? Because there are two kinds of writing in a family story project.
- Capture is writing down what you already know about your family, like names, places, and events. It also includes writing down what you want to know, your questions.
- Craft is using what you’ve captured to write words that become a story.
Set up one place to capture and another to craft.
#1 – Your Home Base for Capturing
It’s much less frustrating to capture what you know once, in a clear place. So set up one writing spot devoted to capturing. This is your Home Base for your family story project, a place you can return to as you write.
I designed the Writing Family History Template, available as a printable PDF or a Google Sheet, to make it easier to set up your Home Base.
The template includes space for your questions and the family details people often want to preserve in a family story: NAMES, PLACES, OBJECTS, EVENTS, TIMELINE. These details help you write your story.
When you capture what you know in your Home Base, it also becomes a meaningful family history document you can share with your kids.
But you don’t have to use the template. You can set up your Home Base in any way that works for you.
#2 – Your Notebook for Crafting
Choose one Notebook for your family story project. I suggest writing by hand because many people find it easier to get a few words down with a pen than with a keyboard.
Your Notebook is your private space to get messy and explore. Here, you’ll take something from your Home Base and jot a few words about it.
Next, you’ll move to your computer and keep crafting, building on the words you wrote in your Notebook.
If writing by hand isn’t for you, a Word document or Google Doc can serve as your Notebook. Again, choose one spot and stick with it.
Need more help setting up your writing spots? See: How to Write Your Family Story: A Simpler Way to Start
3 Reasons Why
Names Make it Easier to Write Your Family History
Writing your family history can feel immense. But what if I asked you to jot down your name? Your parents’ names? That takes less than a minute. And because family names often hold more meaning than people realize, they’re a natural place to begin. Here are three reasons why.
1. It’s Easier to Start With What You Know
You may not think of your parents’ names, and certainly not your own, as “family history.” But according to genealogists, they are. The “golden rule” of genealogy is to “start with yourself and move backward in time.” According to a survey by Ancestry.com, 53% of Americans can’t name all four of their grandparents. For your kids, that’s your parents. For your kids’ children, that’s you.
And it makes sense. When your family gathers, you don’t hear first names very often. You call them “Mom and Dad,” and your kids call them “Grandma and Grandpa.” Middle names are rarely, if ever, spoken.
Writing down your parents’ full names in your Home Base matters because family memory doesn’t always preserve them. And once you’ve captured those names, you may realize there’s a few words you can jot down about them, like who they were named for, why a name was changed, or the origin story of their nickname.
Families have always kept records of names. Your Home Base is the modern place to do that.
2. Your Mother’s Maiden Name Opens the Door to Her Story
One of the most important things a written name record can do is preserve your mother’s birth name, often called her “maiden name.” Too often, women’s birth names disappear from family memory.
Writing down your mother’s full name in your Home Base preserves your connection to her family. It also gives you an entry point to jot a few words about her life before marriage, when she lived as a young person within her family of origin. You may find yourself remembering something about her family, like the cultural origin of their name or her family’s religious heritage.
3. Family Names Carry Stories Across Generations
If your kids and grandkids have children of their own, there’s a real chance they will look to their family’s past for a name. In a YouGov survey, 27% of adults said their first name came from a family member, and another 43% said the same about their middle name. In a 2025 BabyCenter poll of new mothers, family names topped the list, with 23% choosing a family name.
Having a Home Base of family names will matter to your kids. It’s both a resource and a gift. And when it comes to crafting your story, family names often carry character traits, naming traditions, values, and love. They naturally hold stories. That’s why they can quickly lead to a few meaningful words on the page.
People get so caught up in what they don’t know about their family history that they forget to pass along what they do.
Before You Begin Writing
What Kinds of Family Names Should You Capture?
Before you begin writing your family history, take a quick look at the kinds of family names that often matter in a family story, along with the details about them that may be worth writing down.
This is a partial list to help you notice. You may or may not see any that apply to your family. Just note the ones that do.
- A name used again and again — a family tradition across generations
- A name with a story behind it — who someone is named for, or why
- A nickname — how it started or what it meant
- A religious name — such as a Hebrew or saint’s name
- A name that changed — due to immigration, adoption, circumstances, or choice
- A cultural name — a name or naming tradition from your family’s country of origin
- A name someone loved or resisted — and how you know
- An unusual role name — why you call your grandfather “Cracker” instead of Grandpa
- A name people got wrong — what happened when they couldn’t say it or didn’t understand it
Let’s Write Your Story
Start With Family Names
Let’s capture some family names and jot down a few words about one of them. I’ll walk you through it.
Step 1: Capture Names in Your Home Base (5 min)
Write in the NAMES section of your Home Base.
Write down these names:
- Your name (For “Relationship to You” write “self”)
- Your mom’s full name
- Your dad’s full name
🌟Optional: Capture your maternal and paternal grandparents’ names.
Done. Now you have more written down about your family history than you did a few minutes ago, in a format you can share with your kids.
💡 Quick Tip: Every family is different. If there’s another parental figure who mattered in your life, you may wish to include their name, too.
Step 2: Jot About One Name in Your Notebook (5 min)
Choose one name from your Home Base and write it at the top of a page in your Notebook. Then use the prompt below to begin.
- Set a timer: 4 minutes
- Prompt: What comes to mind about this name?
- Jot down: A few words that come to mind about this name.
- If your mind wanders, let it, and jot down whatever is there, like you are taking notes. Just like jotting a To Do or grocery list, write down whatever is in your mind.
- Review: 1 minute. Read what you wrote like a gentle, curious reader. What do you notice? Jot down a few more words. If you notice a feeling, name it.
🌟Optional: Repeat with another name.
💡 Quick Tip: More details may come to mind when you walk, drive, do household tasks, or take a shower. Be sure to write them down when they do.
Next Steps
What Feels Easiest?
Take a moment to notice what you’ve accomplished today.
- For my first-time writers: You set up your two writing spots and wrote a few words in your Notebook. Your family history writing project is underway.
- For my continuing writers: You captured more of what you know about your family in your Home Base and wrote a few words in your Notebook. You made some meaningful progress in 10 minutes.
Choose whatever feels easiest to do next.
Stop for Today
If you are out of time or energy, stop and feel good about what you’ve done. Come back another day and continue writing your family history.
Capture More of What You Know
If you’d like to keep going, consider writing down any questions you have about the people and names you’ve just written. Questions can help you write, even if you never find all the answers.
Below is a list of categories you can choose from. Click one for step-by-step guidance.
Share With Someone
You’ve already shared with one person: you. This may have been the first time you’ve written about your family’s past. Pause to recognize that.
If you want, you can also share what you wrote with a child, your spouse or partner, your sibling, or someone else in the family. You can read from your Notebook or tell it from memory. Family story writers often tell me how much they’ve enjoyed the conversations that follow when they share.
Subscribe below to receive our Story Starter Workbook, a simple guide to help you keep taking small, meaningful steps in writing your family history.
Frequently Asked Questions
FAQs
That’s okay. Write down what you know and leave the rest blank. Jot your questions in the QUESTIONS section of your Home Base so you can come back to them later.
Write an approximate spelling or list alternate spellings for now. The goal today is to capture what you know, not get everything perfect.
That’s okay. Jot down anything else that comes to mind about your family. Allow yourself to detour and jot down whatever comes to mind. Then, as you go about your life, notice whether other thoughts come to mind about that name or your family history. Be sure to write them down in your Notebook.
That’s okay. Start with the people who feel most central to your family story. They may include birth parents, adoptive parents, stepparents, or other parental figures. Write down the names that matter in your life and family.
No. Start with your own name and your parents’ names. If you know your grandparents’ names, add them. If not, you can come back to it later.
The activity will take no more than 15 minutes from start to finish. If this is your first time here and you’re setting up your writing spots, it may take you a little longer.
